The impossible college student who waited for magical solutions.

I’ve been freaking out for days and for some reason everything keeps getting worse. If I freak out harder, sleep less, and eat more garbage for another couple days, will it finally start working?

Sadly no, it will not start working.

How do you know that it won’t turn around?

This is the most researched coping mechanism is human history and it has never worked.

That’s not true! I use it every term and the first two weeks are great but then it stops working and everything goes to hell. So obviously it works!

This is like saying that a knife in the eye is painless because it didn’t hurt when you made the decision or picked up the knife. When you say “the first two weeks worked”, you are saying that the part of your term that placed the fewest demands and asked the least of you “worked”. You need a system that works during the tough spots.

The reason that every single lousy coping mechanism for school works for the first few weeks is that almost nothing is happening in the first few weeks. It’s like the adage that you don’t need to fix a hole in the roof because when it rains it’s too wet and when it’s sunny the roof works just fine.

I am unlike literally everyone else because I have a job or am in school full time or don’t have a full array of butlers and nannies and my problems are special problems and definitely not human problems and I need magical solutions not human solutions.

That’s too bad because we only offer human solutions. If you know anyone who needs practical, human solutions, and human to human support, direct them to us and we’re happy to help!

Have questions, ask here.

Want to place an order? Place your order here.