What are young people looking for in a partner?

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Assignment Type Term Paper
Subject English (composition, Etc.)
Academic Level Undergraduate
Citation Style N/A
Length 3 pages
Word Count 917

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As children reach adolescence, their attitudes and perceptions about friends, family and society change. Teenage years are a difficult time for most adolescents because they are trying to find their own unique identities and also “fit in” with different social groups. Many teenagers experience low self-esteem and self-confidence during adolescence. Thus, they look to other teenagers who share the same experiences for understanding and support. Essentially, with hormonal changes, teenagers diverge from platonic friendships and become more interested in romantic relationships for emotional support, peer acceptance, and to learn more about their own identities.
During adolescents, many young people experience changing hormones and become interested in romance and intimacy. They begin to rebel against their parents and develop their own perspectives and personal values that may differ from their family. However, this leads them to feel lonely and confused. Thus, they look to other teenagers, particularly of the opposite sex who experience the same problems, for affection and comfort. But it also helps adolescents to fulfill their romantic desires by developing a close intimate relationship.
Thus, many teenagers find understanding and emotional support in their potential partners. This leads to a great friendship, because they will be able to relate to one another’s social, personal and family problems. “As adolescents become more autonomous from their parents, their romantic relationships increasingly become a source of emotional support. One study found that, among tenth graders, only close friends provide more support than romantic partners” (Furman, 2002). Their desires for emotional support and intimacy can also be viewed as another form of rebellion against their parents since most parents regard teenage love as foolish and immature.
With the emergence of different social networking sites, such as Facebook, Twitter and MySpace, many teens have more access to find other teens who match their personal interests and tastes. This also gives them more means to communicate and virtually interact with each other. Yet teens oftentimes feel pressured from their peers to engage in intimate relationships. During teenage years, adolescents go through the stage of trying to “fit in” with popular social groups. Thus, they look for social acceptance through partners. Although they begin to develop their own perceptions aside from their family values, they still develop a bandwagon idea, which compels them to want to “do what everyone else is doing.”
According to a study on teenage relationships, “three-fourths of teens age 16-18 report having had a relationship, dated, or “hooked up” with someone and half of these youth have had a serious boyfriend or girlfriend” (Sorensen, 2007). However, peer pressure to date or engage in sexual activity with another teen is different based on gender. Although both sexes are likely to be influenced by peer pressure at some point of their adolescence, males and females respond differently. Gaining acceptance and social status are some of the factors that compel teenagers to find partners.
For teenage boys, having a female partner makes them appear cool to their peers. Many young males boast about the number of girls they have dated or “hooked up with.” This forces them to develop romantic relationships with girls to “fit in.” For young girls, having a boyfriend makes them appear pretty and popular to their peers. Thus, acceptance by peers and gaining social reputation are some of the factors teenagers look for in intimate relationships with different partners.
But the primary reason teenagers desire to find partners is to learn about their own identities through others. Having a close, intimate relationship with another person who experiences the same struggles and have similar interests opens up communication for teenagers. Through partners with similar values and experiences, they learn more about themselves and different ways of coping with stress and depression. They gain interpersonal skills and learn different perceptions and views. This makes them more open-minded and also alters their own perceptions about society.
Through romantic relationships, teens also learn a different meaning of love. During childhood, they are taught to love and respect their family. However, in romantic relationships, teenagers discover a new meaning to love. They have a romantic bond with their partners, which make them feel special and unique. It helps them to develop an identity outside of being a child to their parents or a sister or a brother. But in a relationship, they take on a special role in another person’s life.
In intimate relationships, teenagers learn how to comfort and show affection to others. Through childhood, they have always been comforted by their parents, but with partners, they feel a sense of responsibility to make sure their partners are happy and pleased. This allows them to feel mature and independent. Ultimately, romantic relationships help shape young people’s identities by allowing them to expand their perceptions and roles through social interaction with the opposite sex.
Essentially, adolescents desire intimacy and romantic relationships for a number of reasons. Emotional support is one of t the main factors that influence teenage relationships. As their perceptions change and their relationship with their parents become distant, teenagers look to partners for understanding and affection. Also, their desire to “fit in” and gain social acceptance leads them to want a romantic relationship as well. Overall, many adolescents are confused about their identities and learn apart of themselves in the roles of comforter and lover through relationships with different partners.
























References
Sorensen, Sarah. (2007). Adolescent Romantic Relationships. Cornell University Family Life
Development Center. Retrieved from
Furman, W. (2002). The emerging field of adolescent romantic relationships. Current Directions

in Psychological Science. 11(5), 177-180.